Most of us work with people who could be considered "difficult," often without really understanding what makes them so irritating. Largely, that's because they get under our skin and engage our emotions and, once that happens, it's hard to be objective.
Once we're provoked and begin to react emotionally, our productivity as workers and leaders diminishes, and our perception becomes distorted. We might be convinced that the person is the problem, but in most cases it's something the person is doing - their behavior - that's really driving us nuts.
To begin to understand the phenomenon of difficult people, this blog examines ten of the most common difficult behaviors, discussing how the behavior shows up in the workplace, exploring the "why" behind the behavior, and giving step-by-step instructions for dealing with the problem. The better you understand the essential nature of difficult people and what makes them tick, the more effective your response can be.
As you read through the blog, keep in mind that some difficult people may fall into several categories. Such complex composite personalities can seem impossible to deal with at times. Some are more challenging than others. In every case, patience is essential for coping. It takes time and careful observation to pinpoint the problems. It also takes time for the methods and techniques you apply to take hold and begin to improve your relationship with the difficult person.
Focusing on improving the relationship is important because you can't reasonably expect to change a difficult person - you can only hope to influence and change his behavior. Your power lies in your willingness to alter your own assumptions and attitudes. When you take the initiative, you reap the rewards.